Sometimes Costuming takes a back seat to real life. At other times real life hits the costumer like being hit by a bus. That happened to me, one of my two best friends, (yes, I know you are only supposed to have one) decided that instead of talking things out that we should not be friends. Not the first time this has happened as things have often gone this way in times of dispute. This was not the first time we've had a rupture in our friendship, but it was the last time I was willing to accept we just ignore things and (again) make such a black and white deceleration about a friendship that had sixteen (16) years of up and downs. I had to accept that and move forward, but that honestly was not easy.
Frankly I just shut down. Even though I knew she was going to do this, not at the back of my mind but knowing our relationship, it still hurt. To be honest it cut me to my core. To make another confession I suffer from sever anxiety, that can and dose lead to depression. Costumes, design, even going to (costume (Costume Con) CC32 was in question. But I had to drag myself out of it. I am still going to CC32. Not sure what costumes I am bringing. Certainly not the historical ones I had hoped to bring but I am going. I am going to enjoy the convention, even flying solo, and I am going to see two new places. Niagara Falls and Toronto because I love to travel.
Long and the short, I took a step forward then took two steps back. NOT in the Paula Abdul fashion, but I am working on it. And I will be working on my costumes in the very near future. AKA like tomorrow, for CC32!